Back to Old Ground
The afternoon was lulling me into sleep. I pinched myself to wake me up. My eyelids were dooping into a trance. I was fervently trying to drive dozing away from my system. I should not sleep. My teacher would catch me in such a situation and it was unbecoming. It was agonizing but I had to try hard.
You see, am back to school after 9 years. I have just recently decided to go back to my masteral studies. It had been a very long time since I warmed the seat of a classroom. I have forgotten how to write down notes and how to answer in classroom discussion. I have forgotten how to behave in a class. I was like a kindergarten student attending his first day in school. When the class started, I felt that the pressure was on. Everything was jittery. I was not used with things anymore. I was nervous. I even heard the thumping of my heart so loudly. It was like the drums in a bugle corps. I was like a contestant, who is not prepared to compete. Perspiration trickled. I was melting on my seat.
As time went by, the nervousness went pfft. Now, I am like being cradled on a tree top. I was being brought into the lulling zone.
For 3 hours, I had to stay in focus. It seemed like a century. Actually my professor was no bore. As a matter of fact, he is too good that he can qualify as a circus performers. Unfortunately, I was still dozing off.
I find the emotion very weird. First, I was nervous and then, I was sleepy. I had to find the reason for such peculiarity.
I knew it. I was the reason.
I have to psyche myself. I have to find my reason why I am back to school. I have to learn to love school again. I have to set my goals in life. I have to bring back my focus. I have to bring myself back to my old self.
The task will be easy, a thing lost is easily found. It lies in the chasm of the heart. School is in the core of my pumping volition. I love school. I will survive.
